Last year’s edition had a few hot takes ranging from Emma Thompson’s empowering decision to bare all in the moving “Good Luck to You, Leo Grande” to Lena Dunham’s curious exploration of a ravenous teen’s post-hysterectomy horniness in “Sharp Stick.” This time, Sundance movies confronted sexuality through a darker, even tragic lens. "Certainly," the man replied, "about three minutes ago.Moral outrage may be in vogue and cancel culture always lurks, but sex was everywhere at this year’s Sundance. Can you perhaps tell me when this took place?" Peter, "I agree that was a real act of bravery. The score was 0-0 and there was only one more minute of play to go in the second half when I awarded a penalty against Liverpool at the Kop end." ![]() So the man explains, "I was refereeing this important match between Liverpool and Manchester United at Anfield. Peter asks the man to give an account of his bravery. Peter, "have you done anything particularly brave in your life?" Peter that he hasn't done anything particularly good in his life. The man racks his brains for a few minutes and then admits to St. Peter greets him and says: "Before I can let you enter I must ask you what you have done in your life that was particularly good." A man arrives at the gates of heaven, where St. Second fan: "Why would you bring a piano to the football game?"įirst fan: "Because I left the tickets on it."ġ. The fooball stadium corridor, two fans were talking.įirst fan: "I wish I'd brought the piano to the stadium." “'I'm not that stupid.,” said old Cyril, “.I was chewing last week's date off it.”Ģ. Fancy having your ticket in your mouth and forgetting about it!” “Crikey, Cyril! You must be getting senile in your old age. “Hang on a minute.,” said the gateman, “.what's that in your mouth?”Īs they moved inside his mate said. He looked in his coat pockets and his waistcoat pockets and his trouser pockets, all to no avail. Two old men were holding up the queue outside the turnstyle before the game, while one of them hunted for his ticket. "That's just what I'm worried about.," said the fan, ".my name's Johnny Walker."ģ. You won't get hit unless the bottle's got your name on it." "There's nothing to worry about, lad," said the elderly chap standing next to him. The Celtic fan was taken back for a moment, but then his face lit up and he yelled: "To hell with the Texas Rangers then!"Ĥ. At a local derby between Arsenal and Spurs last season, a spectator suddenly found himself in the thick of dozens of flying bottles. The stranger had a funny look on his face and replied: "I don't know what you're talking about buddy. A Celtic fan looking for trouble went to a complete stranger in Glasgow and yelled: "To hell with Rangers!" The rivalry between Celtic and Rangers in Scotland is well known. ![]() (note-this isn't exactly about football). ![]() Judge: "Well, that's hardly an offense is it?" Judge: "What exactly did the accused throw?" The arresting officer stated that the accused had thrown something into the river. A football hooligan appeared in court one day charged with disorderly conduct and assult. The devil, smiling, responded "Yeah, but we've got all the refs'."Ħ. God, always fair, told the devil, " The heat must be affecting your brain, the game would be so one sided, don't you know all the 'good' players go to heaven?" Satan, the devil, proposed a soccer game between heaven and hell. God invited the devil for conversations to find a way to resolve this dispute quickly. Hours after the end of the world, a border dispute emerged between heaven and hell. Those interested must send in photo of the tickets."ħ. ![]() "Local man offers marriage to any woman that has tickets to the Champions League final. A week before the Champions League final a few years ago there was an ad in a local newspaper which said: The guy: “No…they are all at the funeral!”Ĩ. The man: “That’s terrible, but couldn’t you get another member of the family, friend, or someone else to come with you?” We have been to the last five World Cup finals together, but sadly she passed away.” The man: “Who would ever miss the World Cup final?” He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy. A man takes his seat at the World Cup Final. The third fan blamed.: "I blame my parents if I had been born in a different town, I'd be supporting a decent team."ĩ.
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